April 29, 2006

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Newell, 2005)

Harry Potter has it rough. The wizard-teen deals with friends, girl troubles, mean teachers, hs parents' murder and -- on top of all of this -- the most powerful dark wizard of all time is out to kill him. It's tough being the Boy Who Lived.

With all this crazy magic crap flying about, it's easy to make a muddled, thinly-spread film. We've seen it happen with "The Sorcerer's Stone" and "The Chamber of Secrets." However, the past two Potter films, "The Prisoner of Azkaban" and "The Goblet of Fire," have succeeded fantastically where the previous flicks have failed. Clear, concise and entertaining, "Goblet" doesn't mess around. It sticks to the main plot and doesn't futz around with house elves or Quidditch matches.

In "Goblet of Fire," Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) is somehow entered in the Tri-Wizard Tournament, an event he should be barred from because of his young age. But, lo and behold, the Goblet of Fire spits out Harry's name and the young wizard finds himself embroiled in a dangerous, multi-school competition of brains, brawn and magic.

"Goblet," like 2004's "Prisoner of Azkaban," makes for a fun, imaginative movie. The tournament challenges are a blast to watch (they include a dragon fight and an underwater chase), and the climax of the film will have Potter-geeks in tears -- Ralph Fiennes is brilliant as Dark Lord Voldemort.

Despite some laughable acting moments from the teen actors (they're few and far between), "Goblet" manages to be a solid watch, possibly the best Potter film yet. It's faithful without being confusing and dramatic without being over-the-top.

The Final Verdict: 8/10

April 28, 2006

Spirited Away (Miyazaki, 2001)

In "Spirited Away," Hayao Miyazaki's followup to his late-90's masterpiece "Princess Mononoke," a young girl named Chihiro is moving with her family to a new house. On their way to the new neighborhood, however, the family stumbles upon an old, abandoned amusement park and decide to investigate. Within the park, they find a small village, complete with stores, restaurants and a large, elegant bathhouse. When Chihiro's parents gorge greedily on the food in the park, they suddenly turn into pigs and the young girl is left alone as darkness falls and spirits begin appearing.

"Spirited Away" is Miyazaki's usual -- a whimsical tale of imagination and wonder, riddled with Japanese mythology and legend and sprinkled here and there with life experience from Miyazaki himself. The movie tackles a lot of issues for such a cute little tale, not the least of which include maturity, innocence, human nature and greed. It's a much more accessible film to American audiences than say, "Nausicaa" or "Porco Rosso," but the movie is still true to the director's unique, beautiful style.

Shabby American voice-acting aside, the film is fantastic. It makes me pine for traditional 2-D animation like nothing else. Miyazaki is truly a visionary. I hope he decides to negate those rumors of retirement and honor us with a few more great films.

The Final Verdict: 8/10

April 27, 2006

Slither (Gunn, 2006)

Here are a few of my favorite things: zombies, invading aliens, isolated Southern towns, horribly grotesque mutants, and grenades used as foreshadowing devices. All I have to say is, thank God for “Slither,” the latest slime-fest from James Gunn (the guy who brought you 2004’s “Dawn of the Dead”).

Wheelsy is your basic sleepy town where interesting things never happen. But Sheriff Bill Pardy (Nathan Fillion of “Firefly,” the greatest show nobody bothered to watch) has his work cut out for him when a strange, extra-terrestrial egg lands in the forest and begins wreaking havoc on the unsuspecting community. Grant (Michael Rooker), a wealthy local man, is the first to encounter the egg, and the slimy alien capsule takes him as a host.

Pets begin disappearing, cattle turns up horribly mutilated and Grant’s wife, Starla (Elizabeth Banks), notices some strange behavior from her husband. It isn’t long until Grant is mutated into a slippery squid monster with a taste for human flesh, and it’s up to Pardy and his deputies, along with sleazy Mayor MacReady (Gregg Henry), to track down the creature before he turns the whole town into alien-possessed, acid-spitting zombies.

“Slither” takes a note from every aspect of horror cinema. Like “Tremors” and 2002’s “Eight Legged Freaks,” the film harkens back to the drive-in creature-features of yesteryear. Its B-movie roots add a sprinkle of unique, wittingly subdued humor that stirs in nicely with the gross-out gore, writhing tentacles and flying slime.

Though the film is ridiculous at times – no, more like through its entirety – it’s all in good fun, and you can’t help but snuggle into the theater seat and enjoy. “Slither” isn’t about jump-out scares; its intention is not to terrify the viewer. “Slither” is just a good time, a great flick to see with a bunch of friends on a Saturday afternoon. It’s the kind of film that requires two hours of attention, and nothing more. No complicated sub-stories or plot twists – just good, old fashioned blowin’ up aliens.

The film is fantastically cast. Fillion is a Harrison Ford-esque leading man, with a stoic composure and perfect line delivery. Rooker gives a great performance (until he’s turned into a squid creature a quarter of the way through the film, of course), and Henry is absolutely hilarious as the self-absorbed, paranoid mayor of Wheesly.

However, I must warn you: some of the moments in the film are not for the faint of heart. In one disgustingly brilliant scene, the small band of police officers track the Grant creature to an old abandoned barn. Upon arriving, they find a young girl that the Grant mutant has injected with the alien eggs. The girl has stretched to massive proportions, and has ceased being human – she’s now a bloated, pulsating mass of flesh. I won’t spoil the surprise for you, but just when you think the scene has crossed the line, it goes one step further. The results are magnificently revolting.

“Slither” is a fun flick; a competently made festival of gore and monsters, tailored for the collective disgust of the entire theater. It’s not changing the horror genre so much as it’s paying homage to it, and it’ll delight creature-feature fans to no end. Grab a friend, some popcorn and give in to the nauseatingly wicked amusement of “Slither.”

The Final Verdict: 7/10

Why 'Crash' shouldn't have won

Oscar Night, 2006. Things were going swimmingly. George Clooney started things off classy by giving one of the most clear, concise acceptance speeches I’ve ever heard. “King Kong” won for visual effects. The musical score Oscar went to “Brokeback Mountain.” Phillip Seymour Hoffman won a well-deserved Oscar for his portrayal of Truman Capote. Jon Stewart was fantastic – witty, quick on his feet and tasteful.

Gone were the days of awards in the aisles and time constraints. It felt good, knowing that the Oscars were finally improving, that they had finally ceased their steady decline into MTV Movie Award territory and had begun to restore their prestige and their dignity.

That’s why it’s such a shame that by the end of the 78th Annual Academy Awards, the Academy voters had once again proved to me that they’re maintaining their standing as a bunch of insular, closed-minded idiots.

As Jack Nicholson read from behind his ridiculously huge sunglasses the winner for best picture, my heart sank into my stomach. The air of the crowd at the Oscars was one of shocked bewilderment as Paul Haggis and the producers of “Crash” stood triumphant to receive their award.

Nobody saw it coming … and nobody should have seen it coming, because it shouldn’t have happened.

I was immensely disappointed, yes. But honestly, more than anything, I was angry. Never before had my discontent become full-fledged outrage, but I was absolutely furious. Angrier than I had been when “Chicago” beat out “The Pianist” or when “Saving Private Ryan” was snubbed by “Shakespeare in Love.”
And before you, the reader, get all huffy and assume I’m a racist and a bigot for being upset by the “Crash” win (which is a weak argument in defense of an even weaker film), let me explain to you why, on Oscar Night, I sat scowling as a film that had no right even being nominated stole the prize.

“Bertolt Brecht said that art is not a mirror to hold up to society, but a hammer with which to shape it,” Haggis said, beaming as he hoisted the gold statuette aloft, flanked by producers. “So I guess this is ours.”

Unfortunately for first-time director Haggis (whose past credits include the screenplay for last year’s “Million Dollar Baby” and a few episodes of “Walker, Texas Ranger”), “Crash” isn’t the kind of art Brecht was referring to. Brecht, a 20th Century German writer, was referring to art that actually makes people think; art that changes lives and warps people’s perceptions. And what did “Crash” teach us? What did “Crash” say about race relations that dozens of films – vastly better films – haven’t said before? “Crash” is too contrived and manipulative to even be taken seriously.

The film tackles the issue of race – an issue that should be handled with grace and refinement – with the subtlety of a wrecking ball. It treats the audience like a kindergarten class, like we have no sense of nuance, like we cannot even begin to fathom the complexities of racism. Instead of presenting us with an issue and allowing us to draw our own conclusions, it simply rubs it in our faces for two hours in an attempt to get its point across. It’s a prominent sign of a weak film to be that obnoxiously over-the-top, and I’m not sure I even want to live in a world where falling down the stairs in slow motion warrants an Oscar.

Haggis props these wooden caricatures in front of the camera and expects us to sympathize and relate – but we can’t, because these characters aren’t even remotely real. They have no depth, and are only consumed by their limitless, blatant racism. These paper-thin, one-dimensional representations make for a detached and impersonal viewing experience.

The feeling one has after watching “Crash” isn’t open to interpretation. It’s “racism is bad,” because the film doesn’t allow you to delve any deeper past its broad, blurred surface. But life is more complex than that, and racism is far from a simple topic. You can’t boil down human emotions to a two hour hack-fest and expect it to work.

Many people (the Academy voters among them) found “Crash” to be groundbreaking and thought-provoking – but these people obviously haven’t taken into account films like “American History X,” “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner,” “Malcolm X,” “Glory” or “To Kill a Mockingbird.” “Crash” is about as groundbreaking as an 8-Track. It’s what happens when the director of “Walker, Texas Ranger” tries to be deep, and it’s almost laughable to watch.

The film does try. It struggles like a floundering fish through its entirety to say something substantial, to mean something. But it tries too hard and ultimately smothers its own message of tolerance and acceptance.

“Crash” had so much potential, too. An incredible ensemble cast of talented actors, a fervently passionate director with a rare opportunity to say something significant … “Crash” could have been Brecht’s hammer with which to shape the world, a film that really speaks to people.

There are brief moments in the film, infinitesimal flickers of hope, when that potential shines through, when you catch a glimpse of the brilliance that this movie should have been. It might be a line of dialogue that isn’t completely ridiculous, or a scene in which the characters interact almost like real people. But that faint glimmer is soon stifled by the film’s absurdly numerous contrivances and it is reduced to the spit-shined made-for-TV movie it truly is.

So why did “Crash” win if it’s so bad? Why did the Academy take to it? I’m not of the opinion that the Academy refused to pick “Brokeback Mountain” for homophobic reasons and picked “Crash” to soften the rebuttal from liberals. If that were the case, “Brokeback” wouldn’t have been nominated in the first place. They had to know that the selection of “Crash” would cause the uproar it did (some online film forums went down within 10 minutes of the announcement as thousands of users logged on to air their grievances), especially since it ranked a measly 58 on the list of best-reviewed films of 2005.

I think “Crash” won because it was accessible to the public. It is an easy-to-understand film, with a clear message. It takes absolutely no effort to watch “Crash,” because it does everything for you. It even comes packaged with a free outlook on life so that you don’t have to contemplate it afterwards.

Why not “Brokeback Mountain,” which presented us with a deeply personal story – one that is relevant, one that doesn’t attempt to lecture the audience? Why not “Capote” (my personal favorite of the Best Picture nominees), a splendidly crafted film with fantastic performances? Why not “Good Night, and Good Luck,” a stylistic, beautifully shot piece of cinema? Why “Crash,” of all the nominees?

Listen, if you enjoyed “Crash,” I don’t hate you. I don’t consider you an idiot; I don’t even question your taste in film. I just think you’re extremely easy to please. You should expect more from your movies. Maybe “Crash” is a good stepping-stone for a broader taste in movies. Don’t let your interest in film begin and end at “Crash.”
There are so many films, significantly better-made than “Crash,” that tackle race relations and other tough issues – films that truly shaped the world.

As time passes and the Oscars come and go, “Crash” will be remembered not as the film that changed society, but as the film that pissed a lot of people off when it won best picture. It’s not the kind of movie that lives on in our minds as significant. Give it 10 years at most, and “Crash” will be grouped with films like “Cavalcade” and “Cimarron.”

Oh, you weren’t aware that both of these films were Best Picture winners? Never heard of them? Exactly.

April 26, 2006

THX 1138 (Lucas, 1971)

I'd heard great things about "THX 1138," George Lucas' (of "Star Wars" fame) directorial debut. I blind-bought the Director's Cut the other night, and I wasn't disappointed when I popped it into my DVD player today. The film is a fresh, innovative one -- one that is exctiting and compelling, and still manages to present a deep, thought-provoking story.

THX 1138 (Robert Duvall) is a man living in a stark-white, totalitarian city run by cyborgs. He's given daily doses of "sedatives," which cripple his emotions and turn him into a mindless machine. His only task in life is to build more cyborgs, which in turn are activated and set on patrol in the populace. The cyborgs themselves are a sort of pseudo-Stormtrooper android, resembling more modern-day police officers with metallic faces. THX's roommate, LUH 3417 (Maggie McOmie) is a female human. In a society where love is unheard of and sex is denied, the two find common ground in their confusion, and cease taking their doses of sedatives. They soon fall in love, and try to escape the city where their passion is a crime.

You can tell "THX 1138" is a young director's first film. Lucas takes chances with his angles and story progression. But this adds a bit of unique flair to it. The cinematography is just excellent -- and though the "Star Wars" films are utterly fantastic, they're not known for their especially creative camerawork. Lucas experimented with "THX-1138," however, and the result is an interesting viewing experience.

"THX 1138" is a little bit of "1984," a whole lot of "Anthem" and a pinch of "Star Wars." They all blend seamlessely into a beautiful, gripping piece of cinema. Definitely a must-see for Lucas fans.

The Final Verdict: 7/10

How do my ratings work?

You may be curious as to how I rate films in my reviews. It's quite simple -- done on a scale of one to five stars (with half stars included as well). Easy, efficient and understandable. You'll find the ratings at the top of every review. Here's a chart for you guys:

* Absolute trash. Not worth the time or money to watch.
** A sub-par film. Possibly worth a rental for fans of the genre.
*** An average flick. Entertaining at best and not worth second viewings.

**** Good film and a great viewing experience. Worth multiple viewings.
***** Masterpiece. A must-see film.

So, there you have it. Enjoy!

Welcome to Mattinee Online

Hello and welcome to my little acre-or-so of cyberspace. It's not much, but it's home to my musings. This is a film blog; so on here, you'll find reviews, opinion pieces and infuriated rantings about film, cinema and the movie industry in general. Read, enjoy and leave a comment or drop me an email if you so desire.

For my reviews, I will be using a traditional, five star rating system -- Simple? Of course it is!

I hope to update this blog pretty frequently (at least once a week, but don't hold me to that) and keep it running over the summer for those of you who are interested. Thanks, and I hope you enjoy.